The Purpose of Grief Is…

The purpose of grief in under 400 words. It’s my latest column in the Humboldt County Senior News. To read it, click here and scroll to page 16. Or read it right here:

For two years I was furious with the universe. It started when my husband Alan was


Photo by Bobbi Dombrowski

diagnosed with dementia. Our spirits went to great lengths to see that we met, fell in love, and married—all within a few months. Now they conspired to tear us apart. Enraged, we felt we had been betrayed by divinity itself.

Alan’s diagnosis was what we’d feared but dare not acknowledge. We trusted our denial to  prevent the reality. It didn’t. The diagnosis catapulted me into anger, the second stage of grief. I bypassed the next phase, bargaining. No deals can be struck with dementia.

I thrashed about in depression, too anguished Continue reading